Blog #6--Today Is The First Day Of The Rest Of My Life

Wow, where to begin. Got to South Lake Tahoe yesterday and it's very much like home but with a lake. I heard coyotes talk to one another all night and my cats were jumpy all night long. I've had a stomach bug for the past few days, could be nerves but didn't sleep well at all last night.

Today was my evaluation with Dr. Whitcomb (Dr. W). He is such a nice guy. When I walked in the clinic I kinda freaked out because I wasn't feeling well at all, I was nervous, and I do not like talking to people when I'm in this mode. We sat down and I was immediately welcomed by a very cute, very handsome dog named K2. He's Dr. W.'s Pit Bull who has the most silky, black coat. That was quite okay with me but the scene around me made me feel claustrophobic. People were everywhere, some in wheelchairs, walkers, using canes, some laying asleep on couches; everyone was talking to each other as if they'd been friends for years. In less than 5 minutes one woman came and violated my comfort zone telling me that she knows how I feel, etc. etc. and I felt at that point that maybe I was in the wrong place and was at some church service and that we all should be holding hands, lighting candles, & singing Kumbaya. Everyone there, even the staff, are huggers and it freaked me out. I know that all of these people mean well but I am not a social person anymore. I know most of you who know me say 'whatever' when I say this but I have become a bit of a hermit and I was glad when called into my evaluation room.

Did all the usual paperwork and then Dr. W came in to evaluate me. He did a bunch of things that don't mean much to me but do in the chiropractic and FM world. Lots of move your head this way, raise your leg over to the left, etc. When it came time to do the typical tender points test, I visibly flinched at all of the 18--the worst being the 8 at my lower back. He had his assistant writing down the level of pain for all of these items and after that he said 'forget it, she has this so bad that she is going to hurt everywhere'. We then took x-rays and got to see them. Interesting stuff. The first x-ray showed that my head lilts to the left when I think it's straight. My side view showed that my vertebra are quite healthy and in good shape. He then gave me a physical exam and when he examined my back my he saw a very big sign of FM. While laying on my stomach, if you look at my back the left side looks normal but the right side looks like it has a rope buried underneath the skin and it runs all the way down to the spine. My dad saw it and said it was noticeable.

Dr. W. said I have a severe FM case and that I've probably had it a lot longer than I even knew about. He thinks it could very well be related to my childhood Dermatomyositis. He said he felt confident that I would respond to therapy. I'm still a skeptic here so I'll just tell you what happened next and you can decide what you think.

First, he took these small metal objects that look like barbels and pushed them into my jaw/TMJ area. It hurt a lot and he warned me it would. I handled it for about 15 minutes and then told him to stop. Apparently this is the epicenter of the meneges and basically the root problem. For you physician folks (D. -- you've told me this a 1000 times) he said that what he was doing was turning off the sympathetic nerve system which causes the faulty pain. I stood up and he had me repeat all the same tests we did prior to it and re-evaluated my pain. I didn't notice anything earth shattering at first. . but when I went to my tender spots on my lower back (of which I have 8 that I have never had relief from since I started showing symptoms) and 6 out of the 8 did not hurt a bit. I was impressed by that and you can decide what you want about it's efficacy.

Second, he gave me my first adjustment. Now anyone who goes to a chiropractor knows that it sounds like your neck is being wrenched off but usually doesn't hurt. He told me this shouldn't hurt but when he did it I almost jumped off the table. It hurt so bad on both sides of my neck. He said that the reason I felt pain was because there probably is so much scar tissue that he was tearing through it as he adjusted my neck.

After that, he had to move onto his other patients and guess what? I had to go to the bathroom and not just pee. I had the first normal bowel movement I've had in *4 years*. *4 years* is a long time. I don't know if I was just so nervous but I doubt it because I've been to all sorts of doctors before.

After I came back from the bathroom I did a video interview. I didn't know this was required but I obliged. The man who video taped me is a very nice man and the person who started channel 11 out of Albuquerque (a Christian religious channel -- and no, I did not tell him I was a Wiccan, as I didn't want him to have a bowel movement too). He told me the interview was me just talking and not being prompted with questions. . I guess it went well because afterwards he said that I was one of the most succinct and knowledgeable patients to explain how I feel and that he'd possibly like for me to speak at seminars in NM when I'm well. Again, I didn't tell him that I didn't share the Christian vibe but I'm sure he'll figure it out eventually. I'm being a bit sarcastic but to be honest, this man was one of the most real people I met there. He told me that I would have ups and downs (for you science types, like a sine wave) and that was exactly what I needed to hear.

By this time I was very, very tired (which is expected--in theory--because your body has been given relief after such a long time and now it wants to rest). They understood and let me take all my paperwork home with me. Of course, the check for $7000 had to be written prior to my departure.

So, I told K2 goodbye and left. I apologized to all of the nice staff because my FM fog is so bad that I didn't remember their names. Thankfully it was closing time and there was not a barrage of people wanting to share their stories with me and ask me to share mine. From now on I can say 'watch the video'.

I should explain that the doctors there intentionally foster an environment of positive energy & interaction with the other patients. They want you to bond with each other and want to use one another as your support as many people who come here come alone. I should never be upset when people are nice to me. Kindness is a rare commodity these days.

As always, when I got home I was exhausted and overwhelmed. I took a nap and just finished dinner w/ my dad outside in the cool breeze. Tomorrow I start my daily treatments. M-W-F's I have 3 per day, T-TH I have 2 per day, and Saturdays I have 1. I plan to walk to the clinic as much as I can as it's about 1 mile one way. Then I can start losing some of the whale blubber I've put on during the past year. Massage therapy will occur in the second month or so of treatment but not at this point.

So what's my pain level today? Probably an 8, with the exception of the few moments of freedom from my lower back pain. I have some feeling of relief, like the kind you get when you've been cooped up inside all winter and exercise for the first time. You feel tired but there is some sort of relief. I feel that in my back and that says a lot to me since my back has seemed to hurt forever. I'm still not going to say I am a solid believer but I'm guardedly optimistic.

I must say to my friend Tori -- *you are awesome*. She had called the clinic before I came here and sent me a card to be given to me when I arrived. When I opened the card it had a yummy photo of Billy (Corgan) inside and for her to go to all that trouble was wonderful. . especially since she suffers a lot from CFS, as I do.

I don't know when my interview will be posted on the web site but you can check for it at: www.stopfibro.com. You have to create a profile but it is for statistical purposes only. I've not received any unwanted mail from them at all.

As far as reaching me by mail. . I've debated about giving my address but decided it was okay as they are all temporary anyway. Please address any mail to my attention and send to either address (the first one being the best probably):

**my name here**
c/o Chris Haven RV Park
2030 E Street, Space 35
South Lake Tahoe, CA 96150
fax: 530-541-4248
phone: 530-541-1895

If sending packages, put note "place inside".
----------------------
**my name here**
c/o Kristi Joles
The Fibromyalgia Relief Center
961 Emerald Bay Rd.
South Lake Tahoe, CA 96150

I will probably not be responding too much to emails. So again, if you send me one I am happy and grateful and hope you know why I may not respond.

Let's see what tomorrow brings. . .

l_l